In Episode #125 of the Squeaky Bum Time Podcast, Mike and Laurent discuss the conspiracy theories that followed a penalty bonanza for Manchester United, Manchester City, Chelsea and Liverpool. Also:
- Madness ensues at the Champions League Round of 16 Draw… LIVE ON TELEVISION!
- We celebrate the big CHOP Sports milestone, and give love to Russ and our friends at FanHub, which you should absolutely download right now! More fun stuff to come soon!
- Festive fixtures continue! Tottenham travel to Leicester, Arsenal host West Ham in yet another measuring stick match for the Gunners
Follow us on Twitter (@SqueakyBum_Pod), Instagram (@SqueakyBumTimePod) and Facebook (Squeaky Bum Time Podcast) to stay up to date!
Part of the Chop Sports Media Network!
Transcript
hello and welcome to the squeaky bum
time podcast with mike laurent it is
tuesday december 14th oh my god in this
episode you get a penalty you get a
penalty you get a penalty and conspiracy
theories about in the champions league i
have
a new extra man crush and his initials
are cg
but first mike
our spurs ever going to play another
game this season the covet crisis crisis
crisis is hitting the premier league
again we've got cancelled games what are
you feeling on spurs you're getting
better in the table without playing
yeah we are it's funny we've got games
in hand and we're feeling awesome about
it we're starting to get our respiratory
activity back which is good uh the
reports i've heard say that spurs are
uh going to be among the 99.9 percent of
people who have not died from this virus
which is nice and uh we're going to
continue on
playing i think what might be a weak in
leicester side look say what you will
about the fact that yes they were ill so
they didn't exactly get uh to rest per
se but these are not miles that we're
putting on these legs right so yeah in
some way i still like to think that
we'll be will be fresh for not just
thursday but saturday
the games are coming thick and fast
right and this is the best right
this is where you kind of separate the
men from the boys but one interesting
note on spurs as we talked about last
time that they were going to forfeit
their last conference league game which
we still don't know
the incompetent waifu still doesn't know
what to do
right and so there's a lot of
incompetent uefa going on and that's
going to be a theme among this episode
but
the latest news
that the yuri uefa conference league
draw
included
a supposedly eliminated tottenham
hotspur in it
and everybody's kind of like but but i
thought we were hold on a second you
said we weren't going to because of the
thing and with the stuff and the forfeit
well hold on what actually is happening
is last thursday tottenham's game with
uh ren was cancelled which meant they
were going to likely result they were
unable to reschedule it for before the
deadline which i believe is new year's i
don't remember who knows and again games
are coming every three days so it's very
difficult for spurs to be able to get
another game in um but they were unable
to agree on a time so because tottenham
were the
inspiration for the postponement shall
we say um they were going to uh have to
forfeit they were going to be suffered a
three nothing loss which would mean that
they would drop to third and vitesse
would take the second spot in the group
um
again most spurs fans myself included
were psyched about the idea uh that we
wouldn't have to play in the nit's nit
anymore and uh we would be able to focus
completely on the league schedule well
enter uefa
what's effectively happening is they
haven't ruled yet
they're supposed to
this is you can't make this [ __ ] up
they're supposed to rule that it's a
three three no forfeit and spurs are out
and in the event that that happens the
test will take that spot what they're
doing right now is they're having their
accounting team figure out how many
people in london might watch this game
and whether the tv ratings will be
affected if they lose tottenham which
in the premier league are a
not a power i won't insult them but to
the rest of europe they're a top person
big deal they're a big deal right it
counts to have spurs uh as you're
looking at this this this drawing
marseille is a big deal psv eindhoven
leicester city celtic
that's it right by the way by the way by
the way brendan rodgers with the classic
quote when he found out he was going to
this he was like i don't even know what
that tournament is yeah yeah yeah no is
it nor does anybody brandon nobody knows
what's going on and they're making up as
they go so it's likely classified that
tottenham will face rapid wean wii n
wiener uh
somewhere in australia possible that
they will still i actually think the von
trapps own that team that's yes that's
correct thank you
uh
well done that's a good one well well
not seeing jason it's nazi and chase
well that's a raj and devo throwback too
i like i like that that was a nice job
shout out to the men in blazers one time
wait wait a minute
there you go there's your men in blazers
mug well i had a blue one but we are
great friends of the pod and former
blazer con attendees back in the day the
one that they did yeah the one they did
where they were like oh this is really
expensive people don't want to do this
again yeah that one um but yeah
yeah go through the scores and then
we'll dovetail into the other
inefficiencies
it seems the kids are into this rapid
scores in the order that they were
played manchester city won wolves nil
city never have the dominance that they
expect they'll never be anfield and
that's why liverpool are the best team
in the world but they get a penalty on
an armpit handball against
moutinho the red card was stupid but it
was dumb on ximena's he think he he he
he got a yellow in a slew of yellows and
then stopped the free kick from
happening the red happened city were
going to win this game anyway they
dominated even though city looked weak
they had 25 shots and 10 on target so
they get the narrative that they can't
finish they completely batter wolves uh
chelsea three leads two hard done leads
lee's had the draw in the bag chelsea
get two [ __ ] penalties narrative
continues
two more goals given up by chelsea
where's the defense i know it's in the
pocket of angola conte where it always
is uh arsenal 3 southampton nail
southampton are the weirdest team in the
league they can appear to be incredible
and then appear to be the worst defense
in the league chel arsenal have a really
good goal where they build off her back
16 passes right into the net southampton
didn't lay a hand on him very very weird
goals liverpool huff and puff and blow
aston villa's doors in
um gerard does get the heroes welcome uh
tyrone ming's with his obligatory
penalty and mistake and then the wha
i didn't do anything uh
ings
feels like he could have had a penalty
gerrard was salty about not getting the
draw i think villa were good for the
draw they hung on
but liverpool at anfield are nearly back
to unbeatable i [ __ ] hate it norwich
nil manchester united won united we're
back to oleish united norwich we're good
should have won this game at least good
for the draw ronaldo draws and takes the
penalty because
it's a penalty he's taking it has anyone
noticed that uh bruno fernandez has no
goals now he doesn't take penalties
some fantasy owners of his certainly
have i'll tell you that we're gonna talk
fantasy when i get to crystal palace uh
on sunday leicester city for
newcastle united nil i didn't even watch
this i just know that newcastle are
falling apart they're gonna go down uh i
don't think um
all the money i don't think anytime you
know all that much i like that daca is
playing i like that tilamid is back i
don't know if tilley was was injured but
i hadn't heard his name for a while he
was so and and he's comfortably the most
underrated player in the league uh he
had a great year great year last year
yeah and it kind of got swept under the
rug and everybody is so fast i don't
mean to interrupt the whole scores thing
so fast to talk about vardy so fast talk
about barnes
it's always these holding midfielders we
were talking about it with kante yes
these guys that but don't do things but
dude
he's having and and last year too a
gunda von gunagan-ish year yeah both
last year and this year anyway sorry in
a battle of claret and blue and a total
of point
1.3 goals expected goals nil nil west
ham burnley that's a barn burner uh west
ham dropping points slowly but surely
getting pulled away they're now one
point ahead of united and eight and six
points wait wait hold on i can't do the
math eight points behind chelsea the top
three are indeed the top three i didn't
watch that game and then of course
oh
my lord and savior [ __ ] conor
gallagher completely boss and destroys
everton 3-1 to the palace oh we support
the palace palace palace i love conor
gallagher he's my new um uh jack
greelish and i would trade draculaus for
conor gallagher right now i i love him i
want him to be my mother's son's uncle's
brother that i can hang out with he's as
handsome as fierce as strong he actually
might be better for city than grealish
because grealish likes to stand on the
ball and geillager just gets rid of it
and goes running and goes kick someone
in the [ __ ] face like i said all
[ __ ] day i want to love connor
gallagher i want to love him so bad he's
chelsea chelsea i remember he's part of
the chelsea army and by the way he loves
chelsea he's chelsea all the way yeah he
eviscerated us uh like he did everton
because he hates tottenham because he's
chelsea so i have problems
with with my ability to enjoy
objectively that's really what my
problem comes down to conor gallagher
[ __ ] rules and i don't like him
secretly will hughes was the guy who
actually made it all work he sat beneath
the the two
uh he sat beneath and did all the
running so gallagher can get up and down
and you're not getting terrified
not to get tired you need the legs to
let these guys do good stuff but i'm in
love with conor gallagher he's secretly
along with mo salah winning me the
fantasy league that we're in
scores
you're in second place all right even
though you beat up you beat me
you beat me three weeks ago because i
was at the michigan iowa state game and
i didn't set my lineup and i lost my
what's going on on our team you know
what
i don't care because michigan can go
higher steve cucarello
whatever the [ __ ] his name is that
longer guy from
brighton i think i'm he's in that left
back half of our descents was from
brighton brighton hasn't played in 14
days yeah they're in the lineup i don't
know what's happening to them mendy's
been terrible he's still our goalkeeper
so uh chari are you listening will you
get back to work you [ __ ] coolly
indian
get it done that's for those i've
initiated uh we have like a steinbrenner
cashman
uh dynamic here where laurent's the
[ __ ] owner of the team and our good
friend of the pod chari um
our former co-worker and a good friend
uh he's basically the man on the ground
running the team right but i do
i do make some signings i do review the
championship and connor gallagher
gallagher was one of them and he won you
the game this week however it is
important to say that when they won the
championship last year i sent chary the
money to decide how much he was giving
laurent not vice versa
yes that's true okay that was the
scorers rundown
oh my goodness all right so let's go
back to uefa's ineptitudes no but
there's one wait there's more it wasn't
just the [ __ ] weird spurs thing that
you went two minutes too long on it was
also the champions league
which was a [ __ ] disaster oh god
i wake up this morning and i get some
text messages from friends
basically saying they [ __ ] up the
champions league draw
they have to do it again and i went
isn't it televised live they're like
yeah
[Laughter]
so god i mean talk about must-see tv
holy [ __ ]
so what but here's the thing let's let's
use the stage though right if there is a
sport that thinks there's more
conspiracy theories it's i guess the nba
with the balls and the frozen ball and
the ewing like people in the nba think
the refs are out to destroy their team i
think more than any other there was a
time where they actually worked they
actually did have one ref that did but
soccer is way over the top beyond
basketball like people think literally
that this whole weekend was rigged
because for the big three teams all won
their games on penalties
so when united win it's because they get
penalties when liverpool win it's
because they get penalties when chelsea
win it's because they get penalties and
by the way if you look at the data the
number one team uh in penalties receives
is leads so
uh not so much uh it's actually not true
that these teams get extra penalties
but it feels that way it feels that way
because attacking teams get penalties
right because they're attacking speaking
um
over the course of this season because
of the new rule changes penalties have
been way way way down way down right
yeah that that's all that's stopped that
kind of they've they're back to normal
yeah yeah well nonetheless it's still on
average relative to the last three years
right yes um especially and like you
said though
the kickoff here was really weird they
called it yeah well right but the reason
why is because packing teams have the
ball they're in and around the danger
area they're making you know
different plays and they're they're
taking risks they're frankly they're
putting themselves in position to get
lucky unless you're raheem sterling when
you don't get caught
i mean that's conspiracy theory take
your take your hat off take your tinfoil
no they he really doesn't get calls it's
real i promise you all right but
he uh
so so all of this basically they go
through how much did they get through
like two-thirds of it
before they went through a lot of it
like they had no there was a full draw
and someone went oh wait a minute
how come athlete and and united weren't
so they literally they they take all the
balls they put them in the appropriate
places because there are rules around
which teams can play which you can't
play someone from your group you can't
play someone from your own country etc
etc in the round of 16. that goes away
after this round so you can only get
certain teams in your bowl basically and
they're picking them out and someone
figures out that
united doesn't have athlete in their
bowl
or something like that
and so because they did the whole draw
and everything was already picked and
not in the right
bowls they then have to redo the whole
thing so of course the draws come out
there's teams playing teams everyone's
ready like oh ah cause this is i think
there's a little another step to take
back
these
draws are part there's very little
actual content that goes on in soccer
like one of the things that's so starved
about it is there's really no coverage
right so these draws like the fa cup
draw is famous because it decides where
you're going to go on a trip so you
might have actually watched it and
started looking for tickets i was going
to say not only tickets but like flights
hotels it's not just the teams yeah
teams don't have to worry about it
because they have private charters and
they have hotels and whatever right
before but
i can tell you firsthand yeah i've woken
up at 5am eastern that it was the year
that spurs went to the final and and we
drew city and i was thinking about going
to that city game i ended up not but
nonetheless i was like i started looking
up flights at six o'clock in the morning
immediately after the draw yeah right
it does affect things like
it's one of the things that i think so
let's take another step back it's one of
the things that on the one hand makes
soccer really interesting and exciting
it's also on the other hand like
are you this is a billion dollar
industry you don't have a schedule you
don't know where you're playing what the
[ __ ] are you doing right like you could
plan it out a little bit better like nfl
playoffs at least they kind of know
who's gonna be in they have seeds it's
locked you're like you're gonna play
this person or this person right like
they don't do that it's [ __ ] random
right at least you can make contingency
plans right sure so you know ultimately
you know they have no brackets they
don't do it all planned out basically
the only thing they know is where the
finals gonna be and they [ __ ] move
that thing half the time
well kovid moved things but you know
baku and they put him in like who gives
you the biggest brown bag of cash is
where the champions league final is like
it's in saint petersburg this year
that's stalingrad folks
no it's like followed by its property
it's it's leningrad it's leningrad
but uh you know that's
not
really a cosmopolitan city lovely why
why is it there yeah
well where was it last year when when
you guys played chelsea it was something
something ridiculous it was in porto
because it was they were covered it was
covered open oh i thought it was wasn't
it originally planned for like turkey or
some [ __ ] yeah but turkey was just like
they had as many cats as they had
covered like because it's known for
covid let's be clear before it was known
for covet it was known for civil war oh
that that problem too so
what the [ __ ] are you guys doing
like yeah but istanbul is famous right
it has chris it has it has been famous
because of liverpool for [ __ ] sake
right oh and leeds fans getting knifed
yeah
not a great track record for istanbul
right like like all right the super bowl
rotates every year right between
like 10 years in advance
yes
but if it went from pasadena and jerry
world and dallas and miami
and uh meadowlands a few years ago that
was interesting they'll never do that
again they'll never do that again but
and then they're like
we're gonna go to lincoln nebraska what
the [ __ ] are you doing no you're not
you're not taking the super no it would
be like if they did it at the big house
because just they have a big stadium
yeah but at least ann arbor is nice like
it's it's not
and it can handle that amount of people
it's taking these these smallish crazy
war tools the crazy one is the baku one
right hey we're gonna play the oakland
a's
converted football stadium
and uh we're gonna have the super bowl
there what the [ __ ] are you talking
about that's the [ __ ] it would be more
like if they had it at like
costa rica
yeah yeah yeah right
what are you doing hey guys leave this
island and uh you're gonna get robbed
you should just have it at wembley all
the time anyway that's my
english-centric thing so basically
uefa's draw is all [ __ ] up uh they do
solve it but it does get the tinfoil hat
teams on and it does make for lots of
funny stuff does get everyone thinking
of conspiracy theories
folks
you're giving these people too many
credit
they're morons
they [ __ ] up everything that they
explained we just explained why there's
they're
they're just
reckless with this industry right i
think that's the the great the best word
to use it's not a sport so much as it's
a worldwide conglomerate right
do you just yeah you've got like
you've got uh
hunter biden running this [ __ ] just hey
wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait
wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait
wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait
wait wait wait wait wait wait wait wait
wait wait wait wait wait wait wait
where's the uae where's the guy it was
his laptop that was picking the balls
there you go
yeah it's a [ __ ] nothing of the
government but that guy is a [ __ ]
[ __ ] right so he's like
yeah yeah it's it's it's it's it's it's
you know it's it's roger clinton it's
jeb bush and it's [ __ ] hunter biden
like these are the people running wafer
i mean they how about the which kennedy
which kennedy's involved
whatever the one who's the anti-vaxxer
the son joe joe jr
[ __ ] weirdos anyway so they're
they're incompetent but we do have draws
for the round of 16. now this is where
coming in second makes a difference psg
draws real madrid
city draws sporting it's not to
disrespect these teams but when you
finish top of your group it makes a
difference right liverpool get inter who
barely hung on
bayern in an all anxious uh game byron
vs red bull salzburg they're bringing
them back together you know it's like
1938 all over again um
chelsea get lil i uh twice
twice they got them in two they got them
twice right they got them both time
that's kind of fun lil jonathan david of
canada shout out to the canada soccer
he's gonna score a goal and beat chelsea
uh you gonna get villarreal i'm not sure
that uva is better than villa villarreal
but that's a good one and then the blood
the blood death hole of atletico madrid
versus men united this is not who men
united needed they're not going to be
able to break athletic down uh unless no
no
change it the beautiful one though is
iax get a good draw in benfica not to
disparage the portuguese teams but and
they did get two through which is pretty
interesting but i acts have been
secretly top of the group led the
in goal difference sebastian hallier
formerly of west ham set the record for
goals in a group stage so they might get
through we've got we've got the royalty
here you'd expect
you'd expect real to beat psg frankly uh
city to beat sporting
psg is dysfunctional and i'm not saying
that there of course
but they show up
they don't crumble until
two more rounds in the champions league
right they have not played well for
months but that's okay and so here's the
difference because we talked about it
with united before we before we started
recording
it is um
what the hell day is it december 14th
when you're listening to this yes these
games will not happen until middle of
february
and within that three months
you've got
not just time to heal from injuries you
buy that unless you're still you have
time you have wrong you have time to get
hurt as well so that's fair but you have
uh time to to really get yourself out of
whatever rut you're in currently and
there's a whole transfer window between
here and there
so
i i'm
really not as bullish on real and that's
not to say maybe they go out i've won
ten in a row
but again
okay that
talked to me in february i'm not all
yeah i mean i i had an argument on
twitter with these folks that are like
look at madrid and benzema i'm like
it's the worst league in the world yeah
right now la liga sorry it is this is an
actual fact i don't know how this
translates to quality it is the lowest
scoring league in the world with the
oldest average age and the least
shots created league
i don't know if that says anything about
quality
but it does say maybe it's
slow
and good for old players and and i think
psg's
again
a dysfunctional runaway train
but they can put it together oh on a day
on a day they can beat anybody
and and i i i just i can't bet against a
team with him a neymar and and messi in
it messy by the way right now
i'm not even being funny
i think messi probably has like
real depression like he's not doing well
then you know what will help him seeing
the real madrid crest for old time's
sake maybe that might drive him i think
that i think the barsa thing
you know i it this year
we can we can go into our shout outs for
everybody but i have one thing this year
has shown me that ronaldo
he's not better
as a player i don't think i haven't i
don't think skill wise but mentality
wise
ronaldo's the the beast ronaldo's the i
don't lose guy yeah yeah anyway tell us
about our friends that we're a part of
so uh as you all know we are uh proud
members of the chop sports uh podcast
network run by uh dave cercio chris
gucci awesome dudes they're really
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everybody's growing we're growing
they're growing uh as a network we just
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or seven months so really exciting stuff
we've got like seven or eight shows we
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join our facebook group it's squeaky bum
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yeah and i'd like again to shout out to
russ
from uh fanhub who put us on i hope that
stockport county is doing really well i
loved how grumpy he was it made me i was
like this is an english person who loves
his team and hates big teams
i love that about the english and i love
all the stuff that goes on and stories
about guys from plymouth argyle
traveling 21 hours to go see sunderland
play go look at a map that shit's far
yeah they send a thousand fans i mean
it's just an incredible culture and
we're happy to be a part of that culture
because that's really where squeaky bum
time comes from the name comes from
british culture
the the love of football comes from my
attachment to british culture mike just
is along for my ride but i'm
i would be doing this without him he
would be
doing something else without i'd be face
down in a drain pool somewhere
um but anyway
we're excited to be growing and there's
more on the horizon we've got a big 2022
coming we can't exactly uh tell you
everything yet but we will shortly i
promise uh it's gonna be a lot of fun so
uh thank you again for being along for
the ride that's enough plugs and and and
face time and all that stuff but again
we just want to make sure that as the
year sort of kind of comes to an end uh
we make sure that you guys know that we
we
enjoy doing this we look at each other
for two hours three hours a week and we
laugh but it's because of you guys
thinking we're mildly entertaining that
we keep doing it so yeah thank you all
so much we love you all very much um but
let's talk about something we didn't
love which is
last week's games it was just a news
festival it was pretty it was pretty
dire it was pretty diverse what we told
you would be we said this is hopefully
the worst match week of the year and
hopefully it was yeah
i mean good news
yeah no i'm gonna talk about i'm gonna
talk about city just to use the word i
was listening to some podcasts and
just they found the right word and it's
city are just robotic
it just is the same and goes and goes
and goes it's incredible it's amazing
wolves have the one of the best defenses
in the league they weren't giving up
[ __ ] connor cody
i love him i love his [ __ ] scouse
craziness of being in the middle of that
portuguese team and then of course what
do we say englishness in the premier
league you need englishness
and he gives them that and uh you know
this was like
a man like 45 at least 45 minutes yeah
it was it was pretty long i mean i could
probably just i could probably look it
up really quickly but yeah probably
somewhere
has got a red card late first half i
believe or
36 seconds from when he got right yeah
right at the half yes we got
41 got the red on 40 on 45 plus two
right right and yeah i mean this is um
you know this is a good fight from a
good wolves team and i was i was
sad to see them not get a point out of
that i thought they absolutely deserved
at least one for that for that effort
but it reminded me a lot of
um
chelsea early on at anfield uh down a
man and just fighting like all hell and
they ended up getting them they did get
their draw um but but
um
that was the one where georginio missed
no no i don't know i think so anyway so
but i mean the thing is is like the
narrative will say that
that uh wolves are incredible city had
nine shots on target
and jack reelish missed a [ __ ] sitter
and i mean
open goal shoots it over the bar he
needs those really bad i mean city
huffed and puffed and they couldn't
break through but 23 shots nine on
target that's plenty plenty plenty to
deserve the win so city
get their win that they deserve uh let
me tell you the one moment in this game
is
raheem sterling stepping up to take the
penalty
holy [ __ ] if there is a moment of of
heart and mouth like what are you doing
you terrible fat
but he's on form and he did it he he he
takes the softest shots i've ever seen
they never seem like they're gonna go in
every time he shoots it feels like i'm
shooting uh clearly
he cannot get power behind his shots
it's that little kipper arm that he has
i think he has it on his foot he has a
little kipper foot that i think
doesn't really work character or
something yeah yeah so i mean city go
through that's fine uh the less talked
about that game the better just one of
those games then
leeds chelsea is that a five goal
thriller
chelsea get two penalties on ruediger
[ __ ] [ __ ] housing to the point that
i'm ready to have the debate whether the
penalty box should be [ __ ] round and
not a rectangle because the corners of
the penalty box are [ __ ] yeah right
if you're in that top corner and you're
facing away from goal and someone knocks
you over that's not a [ __ ] penalty
right you should not be because the xg
of that spot is like point one look this
there's there's one very simple
rule change that sort of already exists
was he
denied a goal scoring opportunity yeah
that's objective though okay but we know
it's not objective you know someone in
the box
right but thank you you know what's not
subjective i followed you right down
that path um what's not subjective is
like you said if you're just sitting
there and you're in the literal postage
stamp corner of the box and you just
fall
or if somebody fouls you that's not a
goal scoring opportunity that's a direct
free kick in the danger it could be a
free kick it could be what yeah exactly
or you could even i don't even care let
it be a throw in where you could throw
it in the car i don't give a [ __ ]
oh my goodness we just lost everybody we
just lost everybody from fan hub that's
blessed
but maybe maybe it's something more
absurd maybe you can have the penalty
but it's from 18 yards like it's from
the top
of the of the box like actually you're
further away you gotta shoot it from
further away
i like that
that would be
that would be a little craz you might
not get them you might be like you know
what i'm not gonna take this
we'll take the ball
no because that would create so many set
plays or it should
uh to have a guy like run off anyway it
doesn't matter it doesn't matter stupid
things are never gonna happen get the
two goals the rafinha one
is a little bit harsh he comes in he
sort of slides and gets the ball it was
a it was a striker's tackle but what the
hell was he doing and then the other one
is you know rudiger is a beast a man who
smashed kevin de bruyne's face with his
look he didn't even hit him he just
looked at his [ __ ] eye socket and it
got smashed into pieces and he goes down
like a sack of potatoes like i get it i
understand but it's rudiger in the
corner what are you doing what is he
gonna do from there
what is he gonna do
yeah
it's the end of the game and penal and
chelsea literally get the win at the at
the death i mean at the 95th minute and
leeds are just so hard done they're
injured banford's out again calvin
phillips is out again they just can't
get a break maybe b also runs them too
hard hmm
well maybe bielsa runs him too hard and
doesn't you know they're basically
taught him in disguise at this point
right like
they run out of gas and they don't have
any other people right it's late it's
late pochettino yes uh it's late
pachatino and it's it's a direct
correlation to be also because you know
as a [ __ ] disciple of him yeah so
yeah yeah yeah so i mean you know the
big boys are getting penalties so
city get a penalty everyone gets a
penalty chelsea get two liverpool get
one on steven gerrard's return to
anfield he gets the cheer steven gerrard
god
he's
he's [ __ ] charismatic that's what it
is that's the word right like he's on
the sidelines you're like
i what let's i'm
okay let's do this
and i think his team are playing like
they have a charismatic leader yeah
right it's sort of
i mean klopp has that too like i i watch
klopp on the sideline okay where are we
what are we doing i'm going let's do it
no
charismatic isn't the word i would use
for klopp co-op is more like whimsical
and like
oh but crazy you know how i i always
judge things by by lisa lisa sees klopp
she's like oh what's he up to i'm like
i got you
she sees pep he's like oh he's he's a
little intense isn't he he's an [ __ ]
yeah he's a little intense well sorry
the way that i would look at it is like
gerard but gerard what i'm saying is
gerard's got the thing he's cool
yes absolutely i'm not disagreeing with
you i'm just saying that i don't think
klopp and him
and it's not it's not the same it's
different yes
yeah but uh you know gerard's got his
team playing hard i mean they hung on
they were in trouble
to be fair like i said pull the best 11
in the
in europe at least absolutely we'll see
how they do uh later on but salad gets
his
draws his penalty
it's [ __ ] annoying i have to say that
since fabinho and thiago have been in
the midfield yeah the liverpool don't
give up [ __ ] yeah they're looking solid
yeah exactly super solid and you're not
what i've noticed is they're not you're
not able to isolate alexander arnold on
the fence which is the way to beat
liverpool it's to get over to him
quickly so if that through ball's got to
get through that midfield because
usually fabinho's there to cut it out
because they know and they and i think i
think alexander arnold knows but the
amount of good ball he delivers you're
just like you are [ __ ] incredible
well so let's let's stop right there
because
that's exactly where it is
the idea is not go down the right and
beat him down the right it is to bring
the ball from the middle of the park
over
basically put it into space behind him
and let your wingers go get it right so
that he's back there and not up here
sure
but the problem with that is that
there's basically a brick wall in
between where that that more or less
[ __ ] highway was last year right and
so that's where the main difference with
thiago and fabinho really yeah they just
stopped they stopped
they're preventing things from happening
it's yes and in preventing they're
realistically they're in the headspace
of the opponent because they're they're
trying it less as well right so so it's
a combination of yes they've been
stopping those balls going by but also
at this point it's like uh find a new
way you know so so and that's kind of
the game plan originally has been like
you said this is how this is the way to
at least keep liverpool honest
not necessarily beat the [ __ ] up keep
them honest this is their their weak
link as we always say and we kind of
he's incredible but also a weak link
right
no he's in he he is a literal defensive
achilles heel and i don't think
anybody's running that yeah he is as
good offensively as he is a liability
defensively right yeah and so you should
go okay cool come on in it's almost as
if you sucker him in and then you just
basically run right run right by him but
now
there's
okay well how do we beat liverpool and
everybody sort of looks around oh [ __ ]
yeah exactly and while you're saying oh
[ __ ] the midfield the middle of the park
is taking the ball and while you're
basically caught with your pants down
they're passing it out to diego jota to
monet and most importantly to mohamed
salah who is for my money the most
dangerous man in the world right he's
he's incredible so he gets the penalty
that makes now to be fair like villa
would have been lucky to get anything
they had no shots on target but they had
one penalty shout it was a little bit of
a sloppy ball ing's into allison allison
is not where he should be he takes
things down
i think this is one of those where if
ings goes nuts he gets the call but he
kind of just goes oh i guess i fell down
like what are you doing you you just
pretend he bit you anything anyway so
but i liked i like that gerard was
pissed off i liked gerrard as a manager
i think i i secretly not secretly i just
like gerard i don't know there's
something good about him there's
something about the fact that when he
was late in his career he came on as a
sub against uh against united one game
and he got a red in 90 seconds i [ __ ]
love that
yeah no like we said he's cool he has it
yeah and uh i think i i think i want to
see him succeed at villa but i want to
see him have sustained success at villa
yeah he need i think to if he does two
years he'll be he'll be good it's one
year is not enough it's got to be at
least two it depends on the amount of
success it really does and it also
depends on when liverpool is ready for
him right yeah um
it depends on how long klopp is
interested in doing this
um
i think he got rid of his glasses
right right it's really i think
i don't think that that's imminent i
think that's on
uh like a year ago maybe a year and a
half it was on them it was way back in
the mind of every liberal liverpool fan
but now having seen gerard managing in
and field against them
it's a lot closer to the top of mind so
the big one though yeah i'm curious how
the next two years go for liverpool as
far as the manager's perspective the
coach that has to live
in post van dijk sala
that's going to be tough
those are not replaceable players no no
no i didn't i i would never say that
they would yeah i mean like if if i'm
clop i'm like oh you guys are going i'll
go with you i'm let's go yeah yeah cool
see you later yeah oh we're going other
party's over yeah let's go to the other
party time holy [ __ ] it got late
i would say um
it's gonna be a lot down to fenway
sports group by the way new uh owner of
the pittsburgh penguins uh so they did
yeah they did buy them um
but it's gonna be really down to the
first bad later on
this is the difference and by the way as
soon as crosby and balkan leave that's
your van dyke and and salah
uh which is coming soon as well but um
my my thinking is how do you you they've
already tried to start with guys like
diego jota right so um
no you're not going to get another
masala i know you're not going to get
another virgil van dyke but you can get
close-ish if you keep the rest of that
squad pretty close together uh
lucky
what do you mean with both of those
scientists well van dyke they played a
lot
they didn't pay that much they didn't
know salah was going to be no way they
got him from fiorentina for like 20
million
yeah no they didn't in fact i would say
oh it was roma it was roma it was roma
are you sure yeah i thought it was
fiorentina but anyway he was at he went
from chelsea to fiorentina to roma
i was close because he beat you know i
said fiona he beat spurs in the europa
league one year um
yeah but no i mean it's very similar to
sunny uh sunny was an 18 million dollar
signing and look at him now um obviously
having different seasons but last year
you could have had the exact opposite
argument about sunny being a world
leader in salah being pretty good but on
not on his level right so i think you
know it's funny
it's not the right age but i think
sunny and liverpool could do what
what he does but from the other side
he's as good
sometimes oh you mean like it's
if you put like if you were in the team
yeah
instead of stella yeah absolutely yeah i
would agree i think that you know
turning to alexander arnold is special
and does a lot of things exactly and
it's just a good team it's just an
amazing team yeah and salah is now on
fourteen and nine which is [ __ ]
ridiculous um
i i could stop talking about him well i
was gonna say let's dovetail into uh
this coming week's games because as i
said we're going to be playing we're
going to have like a day and a half off
every week okay for the next two to
three i don't i don't need to talk about
united they got a penalty to win but i'm
should have got a draw i just i need a
moment
yeah take your
you guys can't see this his pants are
not on by the way uh it's conor
gallagher time yeah
he
wears 23 like don manningly a man i
loved
and he's a new man that i love he's 21
he's handsome
he's wears a headband his hair is sort
of scraggly i'm not sure if it's dyed
it's not quite dyed but who who's this
[ __ ] from norwich who he's like he
looks like but he's waiting well can't
well it's a [ __ ]
that dude can't well is is in transition
he's not enclosed he's not a man conor
gallagher is a man god damn it
i mean he's gonna get up
accidentally insulting conor gallagher
just to watch you freak out just an
amazing amazing player who
when you watch
and really pay attention he's running
constantly trying to get in another
space trying to get on the ball and he
gets on the ball gets goals he's got a
very his favorite player is frank
lampard i heard because i read about it
it's in wikipedia maybe i'm not sure um
and he's very frank lampard asking that
he is a midfielder who can who's as
comfortable coming showing for the ball
from the defense as being in the box as
an extra man uh along with the strikers
so he's just an incredible player the
the selhurst park fans if there's a
stadium that comes through on television
as a place to go it is selhurst park i'm
sure it's in the deepest ghetto of hell
uh but it's also
afc richmond's ground the dog pound uh
from uh ted lasso so it's it's known on
television more and more as the home of
of richmond probably more people have
watched ted lasso than then i bet you
that's probably why they are filming
there because it has such good it's
known for such good acoustics yeah yeah
so
um he won them the game and the final
goal in the last minute after running
all day on a steal on a [ __ ] up from
sheamus coleman a secret another guy i
love but that everton team is in the
unwatchable pile of death uh another one
for the dinosaurs rafa
can we can we trade him for eddie howe
i'm going to make that i'm going to will
that into existence oh my god that's
what needs to happen eddie howe to
everton
rafa to newcastle does rafa save
newcastle
rafa would save newcastle
and anyhow would unlock everton
while they give up lots and lots and
lots of goals
um the less said about brentford the
better but they get a win thank god uh
in bueno gets to win no tony in that
game so no brian
turning it around that was the friday
game
uh so
we the less we talk about that game as
well but we're just happy about it
because now brentford are in the top 10
where they belong they're on 16 games
with 20 points you know what that means
they're well on their way to 40. oh yeah
they'll be okay they're not going down
they'll be okay yeah um
whether you said 16 points i didn't i
have the table up 16 games
20 points yeah 20 points they're
literally doubling up the relegations
off they'll be fine um
but yeah i mean and and i don't think
that that's the bar for them anyway but
let's switch gears because we've got
some time left here but um let's run
through what's going to happen starting
today uh it's tuesday wednesday thursday
friday off saturday sunday so
like i said
get ready to be unproductive at work get
ready to enjoy
pretty much more european football than
you can handle in the next three weeks
not possible i can always handle it i
love it yeah yeah well i'm firmly in the
i've had enough category but i haven't
had to um get frustrated about spurs and
like oh yeah they're doing well not
playing it's amazing
undefeated uh so it's been great but uh
so they look like they will be back in
action against leicester which i think
is going to be one of the big games of
the week uh leicester coming thursday
against against uh newcastle spurs
going to the king power where generally
this game does have a lot of goals in it
so i would
i'll hit the over here's the thing
lester are one of the worst defensive
teams in the league they are falling
apart i've called it here
i will say it again
it's schmeichel schmeichel's shitty
yeah here you are kane
gets off the mark spurs win too no off
the schneid
spur i'm sorry lester our bottom
five defensive team they're there with
everton watford
uh newcastle they're in the bottom they
are now we think we think spurs will be
healthy enough to play this game i think
as i said in the open um but we'll see
that's still to be determined that's the
thursday game there's time between here
and then hopefully everybody's feeling
well enough to do that um one game that
has been canceled unfortunately already
is today's brentford united game sounds
like uh the you know juan is going
through the united camp and that's not
great so we wish everybody was all there
united are [ __ ] lucky that would have
been tuesday night
in branford
bouncing they would have branford would
have come and punched them in the
[ __ ] mouth
especially coming off a great game on
friday if tony was able to play i would
agree with you if not then he's a big
miss i mean you can get past watford
without him but i don't think you can
really hold a candle to united right now
united's defense is not good they barely
barely hung on because de gea saved
their ass but in buemo and so much as he
won the game this weekend oh he'll hit
the post he'll hit everything but the
back of the net so uh tony is is so
important to that team's success long
term and i don't know this could be a
a win for brentford down the line
because you know they're still gonna
play united at home and they're probably
still gonna have a night game so
um that's something if they're going to
reschedule it they'll probably schedule
it in like february and midweek during
an fa cup week when they're both out or
some [ __ ] and then they'll get their
night game maybe on the day of the
league cup final or something weird like
that nora justin villa is only has
narrative because dean smith is playing
aston villa i would expect aston villa
to win that game but weird [ __ ] happens
and then the game that is a is tasty uh
city versus leeds
last season leeds took four points off
of city so
scary stuff for city well the way city
are playing right now they should at
home
blow the complete doors off of leeds
well you said it'll be a finishing
problem no calvin phillips no bamford um
yeah that's i'm not i'm not feeling
really good about what leeds has right
now right so i mean in so much as if
they had their full 11 yeah it'd be a
great game to watch but this should be
city to the races um again so we'll see
if city score in the fifth first 15
minutes you can bank them for three if
they don't they'll win one nothing yep
that's fair uh but enough about them
let's talk about the the game that
you're really excited about this week
which one brighton versus wolves why
would i be excited about that because
you love brighton and i think that
wolves are going to give them a hell of
a run right now i'm more interested in
arsenal west ham london darby's baby
we'll get there in a second but i think
that i think that wolves are smarting
over
uh that the the shitty turning points
you know armpit handle and the red card
right so they're not going to have
jimenez which is a big miss
but yeah i mean he
yeah i mean if he's feeling well enough
to kick out something and maybe he's
feeling well enough to hit a ball once
in a while but um
yeah
my friend
my friend neil mope and his wool and his
and his wipes he's gonna
he's gonna go after wolves
he loves a dog oh
he doesn't give a [ __ ]
[Laughter]
all right let's talk about the london
darby uh uh west ham wolves west ham are
better
i mean sorry
marshall yeah west ham are better
arsenal are inconsistent
i see this as a classic game
where arsenal
this is another measuring stick game
every time arsenal have played someone
in the top of the league like city or
liverpool or chelsea they get the doors
blown off them
this will be another test and united to
for that matter this will be another
moment where
is arsenal's playing
as good as west ham's grafting
and can arsenal take a real punch
uh they have historically not been able
to take a punch they've been able to
take punches within their own realm of
things like a crystal palace punch or a
brighton punch
but can they take a west ham david moyes
glasgow kiss punch uh
we'll see we'll see how that goes uh for
them i mean west ham are struggling a
little bit lots of injuries um
mcaalantonio hasn't scored in a while
he's scored six goals i think in the
first five games and hasn't scored since
the depth is being is now being tested
uh they've no like bana they'll have to
figure out ways to manufacture and get
their defense going but i like west ham
in this game if they're going to
stay in that top four sport they've got
to beat arsenal uh if not they're going
to slide even further and arsenal will
actually jump them
uh it could be that this is the last
weekend with uh west ham in the top four
if if manchester united win we went
through united's schedule remember
united don't play a team outside of the
of the bottom 10 currently
until
march
5th yeah that's how good a run united so
i mean they can go undefeated they're
going to surpass west ham it's a
question of when not if but yeah but
yeah i mean and it could be this weekend
you could find west ham and all the way
in sixth you could find them all the way
in seventh by the end of thursday uh and
by the way they would be
in seventh behind spurs or sorry they'd
probably be still beyond spurs um on
goal difference but spurs having two
games in hand on them so tied for for
seventh place so yeah uh and then we do
we do have the we do have the transfer
window opening uh i'm gonna i'm gonna
will this into existence anthony martial
is gonna go to brighton
or lindegaard lingard maybe we'll go to
brighton i'm just looking for one of
these
classy finishers to to really be a tag
team partner for moped
or is he going to share wipes uh this
he's a real bareback he just uses
newspaper
i'm just going to go to it that was the
squeaky bump time podcast with mike's
larry
core teens we are the football wing of
the chop sport network and we record on
tuesdays and fridays so be sure to
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